I learned this week that one of my former students passed away from an apparent suicide.
When I received the news, my heart broke and has continued to remain broken. I am so confused and so sad and all of this really doesn’t make any sense.
And then I find out that Jake stepped into a new role in life and there is speculation that this is perhaps the reason for the sudden loss.
Why, if you have a loving family, would you end your life so quickly? Was their pressure and disappointment from others? Was the grace of God forgotten? I don’t know the answers, but I do know that the world has lost a truly beautiful person.
One thing I would like to say to all my students, both former and present. If God has, in His plan, our paths to separate, never will my love and heart separate from you. Each and every one of you truly do have a piece of my heart and that will always be a tie that will bind us.
When times get tough and when it seems like no one is around, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do not forget that Anna and I are here for you and would love to be a listening ear or a shoulder to cry on.
To the Miller family, I can not even come close to imagining the pain you are going through!!! Please now that Anna and I, and for that matter our entire student ministry, has been on our faces praying for peace that passes all understanding on your behalf.
8 Comments
do you really think that becoming a father was so threatining to jake that it caused him to kill himself? I can tell you that it wasn’t he was asking about names, doctors appointments how long it would be before they could hear a heartbeat… he wasnt scared to be a father he was apparently very disturbed, and had a lot of issues, and in the process of trying to rid himself of problems, acted very selfishly, i think amanda is hurt enough andhaving to deal with enough emotions right now maybe, just maybe you should think about her and her feelings before you post stuff like that.
Amy Gordon
soon to be a proud grandma
Amy,
thank you for your post. I think you misread the post or perhaps I wasn’t very clear.
I in no way think that was the reason why Jake did what he did. I only wonder if he felt extreme disappointment from others.
The intent of my post is to remind my students that I LOVE them dearly. I would hope that any of them, including Amanda (as she has) would contact me for encouragement.
In times like this, it is not about pointing fingers. It is instead, a time to love and pour out God’s grace.
Ryan-
Everyone that knew Jake and his wonderful family feels a deep sadness for them all! I think your post was wonderful and God knows you feel the loss like everyone else! I think your post was very loving!
It is sad to think that people get on your blogsite just to catch you saying something they do not like so they can respond in a hateful way! Only God knows why Jake did this and he was forgiven the minute he did it! Isn’t it wonderful that we have such a forgiving God? It would be awful to live in a world with individuals who did not know how to forgive!
I along with so many others including yourself have a special love for the entire Miller family and I think they would appreciate any kind words and prayers on behalf of their family!
I pray the Miller family does not read the above comment because it would be so hurtful to them!
Take care!
Cristy
Cristy,
did you stop to think that maybe she wasnt being hateful at all but looking out for her little girl?
you have to look at it from her point of view too.
You have no idea how much it hurts her to se her daughter going thru this, and i know that its not easy for anyone, but just because someone states there opinion doesnt mean theyre being hateful…
ryan i have never been to this blog before, it was brought to my attention by a memeber of your former youth group,that also took it to mean that becoming a father was so scarey to jake that he chose this path instead. i was trying to let you and others who may read your blog know that this was not the case, amanda is truley having a hard time dealing with every thing right now and i am pretty sure that as much as she misses you and anna, this blog would break her heart, no matter what your intention the blog initself was hurtful to my family and i. as for cristy’s comment i personally have never said or done anything to try and “catch you ” doing wrong i chose to stay at cambria for the kids in the youth group, they needed someone to be there for them and still do.
amy
Let me make myself very clear here:
#1 I had no idea of who the mother was but thanks for clarifying that to me.
#2 The intention of the post was, ONCE AGAIN, to remind everyone of the love we have for ALL of our students, both current and former.
#3 To point out, the most important thing of all, God’s grace.
I in no way, as you read it, said that it was because he was becomeing a dad. I stated, “Was their pressure and disappointment from others? Was the grace of God forgotten?”
All I know is that often times, we as Christians, kick our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ when they are down. Instead we ought to come beside them and walk through the restoration process with them.
Now that I know that the mother is also one of my former students, I can pray for a face and a name as well.
My prayer is the same as before, that the Miller family and now the Gordon family are comforted through this terrible tragedy and that the peace that passes all understanding falls upon them.
Ryan – thank you so much for continuing to be a picture of God’s grace – I love you and pray for you and your family often. ‘Muah’ to you and Anna! XO
“Jake stepped into a new role in life and there is speculation that this is perhaps the reason for the sudden loss”
There is the exact thing you said, word for word copy and pasted,
that is what my mom was talking about not the line
“Was their pressure and disappointment from others? Was the grace of God forgotten?”
two totally diferent things,